Pointless.

I think I understand what my cousin brother was going through when he was in his "phase". The time where he did everything idiotic if it was possible. He just had this hatred in him towards the family. And it was pure hatred without a base. A reason, if you will. I mean, hatred without reason is something really stupid and asinine. But I really get why things like these happen now. I totally understand.

I'm starting to hate the people around me, (minus shiang and my dogs) because they favour someone over someone else and deny everything. They say they don't but they fucking do. I really don't know how many times I've ranted about my sister. I lost count. Anyway,

I know you are so fucking hot and everyone likes you and dislikes me. I am not as good-looking as you and in your own fucking words, 'hot like me'. I do all that I do for you just to keep you out of harm's way and protect you from things that you dislike. And you curse me to my face saying that you wish I'd die right? Fine. When I do, don't fucking come to my fucking funeral because it is not the type of funeral that "hot'' people like you come to. I know that everyone loves you more because you are ''better'' than me. Even our own mother. When you are angry or pissed off at me, she nags and yells at me. But you? Just now, all she can say is, 'don't make me angry because I am already angry with so-and-so.' Wtf? People only chide me when we argue. And in front of you just to give you the satisfaction to see everyone against me because I am not as ''pretty'' as you! Not as ''good-tempered'' as you! Wtf? Have they ever seen you throw a fucking tantrum? Oh wait. I forgot. People don't give a rat's ass if you are bad tempered or not. Because you are oh-so-pretty! But when you are so wrong and everything, nobody chides you in front of me! And when I confront the people responsible, all they go is, 'how would you know if we never scold her? Maybe when we scold her, you're not there.' Wtf?! Then all this just means that you actually think of her pride if you scold her in front of me isn't it? Don't give me all the bullshit about you people scolding her behind me. Because if you can do that for her, why can't you do that for me??

You people don't have to do all these kind of crap just to show how much you people hate me. If you really don't care about how I feel, then fine. If you feel that I am not worth comforting, then fine. If you don't care, then don't bother. Because, its pointless anyway.